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Oppikoppi boneheads – Is Dit Net Ek Of Is Als Tos?

In Is Dit Net Ek Of Is Alles Tos? deur griffinRek jou bek

Ons (griffin & chopper) se boek, Is Dit Net Ek Of Is Als Tos? word hierdie jaar (2019) teen Augustus se kant 11 jaar oud. Om dit te celebrate het ons besluit om alfabeties met die lys af te gaan en ‘n paar topics uit die boek te kies om weekliks hier op Watkykjy te publish, seinde dat ons die regte besit. Dis lekker kort stukkies wat jy op die kakhuis kan lees. Dink daaraan as jou klein zef kakhuisbybeltjie met pitkos vir elke dag… Wel, elke dag tot ons die boek se einde bereik.

Oppikoppi boneheads
Kyk, ek laaik ‘n dop net soveel soos die volgende ou, maar daar’s iets wat verkeerd gaan as jy te veel dop en son mix, veral in die bosveld. Ontmoet die Oppikoppi-bonehead: Vieslik vuil in sy stowwerige overall (of mock deathrow suit), dop oppie pens met ‘n waatlemoen* helmet op sy gesuipte kop waaronder sy rooigebrande bakkies of skree of grinnik. Lieflik.
Oppikoppi is sweerlik die eingste musiekfees in Suid-Afrika waarvan die naam so ydelik gebruik word. Elke oggend word die bosveldstilte vergruis met ‘n bulderende “Oppikoppieeeeee!” dat die kranse antwoord gee. En so gaan dit aan, tot laat die aand. Of regdeur tot opstaantyd. En hulle kamp altyd naby jou, trust my – hulle is oral, bietjie soos die teenoorgestele van engele.
Gebeur dit by raves, huh? Sie jy byvoorbeeld twenty-somethings wat van hulle tiete af is op pille en “H2-ahoooooo!!!” skree? “Voooortex! Vooortex!” Nee, jy doen nie, Vernon Koekemoer sal jou bliksem.
En hoekom moet die doringbome op die plaas deur jou 24 leë Black Label-blikkies of jou een-ply boudservette ontsier word? Doen jy dit by die huis, ou bees? Nooi jy 30 mense na jou braais toe sodat hulle jou huis kan bevark en leë blikkies aan jou connifers hang?
Dis dieselfde brekers hierdie wat die kattebakke oopmaak voor negeuur die oggend oggend (saam met die derde dop) en skiem almal in ‘n 200 meter radius ket gekwalifiseerde hangovers sal dit moerse like om nou na “De la Rey” te luister. Op full-blast en op repeat. Met sporadiese uitbarstings van “Oppikoppieeeeeeeeeee!” tussenin. Hier teen tienuur begin hierdie clown (al klaar hees) aan dieselfde mense wat hy met sy kak musiek geïrriteer het te karring vir jumper cables, want surprise-surprise, Ouboet se karbattery het gekak.
Sonder sukses sal hy maar probeer om ‘n band te gaan kyk (verkieslik Koos Kombuis) en aan sy equally donk tjommies met bierkartonhoede reg voor die stage gaan hang en aandring daarop om die liedjie wat die meeste lugtyd op RSG kry eerste te hoor. Die liedjie word altyd laaste gespeel, maar hulle sal skree so tussendeur die dodgy opmerkings wat hulle na die meisies se kant toe gooi.
Ou, jy gaan nie score nie. Jy is ‘n bonehead. “Oppikoppieeee!”
Kry vir jou.
*In die afwesigheid van waatlemoene sal die Oppikoppi-bonehead gaan vir ‘n Crocodile Dundee-leerhoed of Black Label-bierboks. Ten spyte van die ekstra dekking bly die gatsiggie steeds helderrooi. Van die dop.

Is Dit Net Ek Of Is Al Tos is in 2008 geskryf en uitgegee en daar was so baie copies verkoop dat ons dit in 2009 laat herdruk het. All-in-all is daar nog net so 10 onverkoopte copies oor op aarde en ons sal teen Augustus se kant besluit wat om met hulle te maak. Kort antwoord – dis nie tans te koop nie.


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griffinOppikoppi boneheads – Is Dit Net Ek Of Is Als Tos?
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Dis naweek, kom ons fokken duik!

In Dis naweek kom ons fokken duik! deur griffinRek jou bek

As jou naweek uitdraai soos jy beplan het, sal dit fokol planne behels.

griffinDis naweek, kom ons fokken duik!
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Tennis has a new hero after Monday’s Wimbledon – Cori Gauff

In Movies en TV deur griffinRek jou bek

Our top 10 weekly selection of DSTV Now | Showmax | YouTube | Netflix | Amazon Prime

The Williams sisters are quite something, hey? Between them,  over a period of sixteen years, they have managed to put eleven Wimbledon trophies on the mantelpiece next to the other kaggelkakkies (which turns out to be more trophies from other grand slams). They probably have enough trophies to melt down and turn into a statue bigger than the one of oom Nelson Mandela in Sandton Square. These two sisters played formidable tennis over the years, had the most imposing serves and changed women’s tennis forever…

This past Monday, women’s tennis was probably changed again. It might be a little bit early to wildly speculate, but I reckon we’re dealing with a definite tipping point. Cori Gauff, also known as Coco Gauff, who is ranked 313th in the world, beat Venus Williams in her first round match with straight sets of 6–4, 6–4.  The big significance here is that Coco is only 15 years old!
Here is her brief CV:
In 2017, aged 13, she became the youngest ever finalist in the girls’ singles event at the US Open.
She won the Junior French Open in 2018 – the second-youngest to do so.
She is also the youngest female to qualify for a Grand Slam tournament main draw and the youngest player overall to qualify for the main draw at Wimbledon in which she totally fucking kicked ass!
Of her victory she said: “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for her – I told her she was so inspiring, and I’ve always wanted to tell her that but I’ve never had the guts to before.” Guts, hey? So she chose a different route to approach her: She kicked Venus’ ass first and then told her “you rock!”. Then Gauff sat in her chair and had a little cry into her towel – a reminder that, for all the maturity and skill she had displayed on the court, she is still just a child.

Her maturity extends to off-court as well, especially to social media. She doesn’t brag about any of her achievements on Instagram like you would expect. Instead, her bio is  #prayforsudan with a link to a Unicef press release, detailing children killed, injured, detained and abused amid escalating violence and unrest in Sudan. Her social pages has in the past also carried references to Pride-related issues and crises around the world. This kid’s head is screwed on the right way.

I can’t for the life of me think that I would have displayed maturity close to any of these levels at the age of fifteen. I mean, coincidentally  at the age of fifteen, I was in fact the number one player in the school’s first tennis team and the matrics hated the fact that that a standard seven latie fucked them up on the tennis court. With my inflated of levels of confidence and Cori Gauff’s surname, I would have probably printed myself a t-shirt that read “Gauffuck Yourself” like the one I designed below.

Now I actually want one of these shirts…

Hopefully you watch round 3 of Wimbledon this weekend! For the rest,
Let our Plumlist top 10 help you along:

# 10 Sing together, live together
Local film Asinamali, which translates as “we have no money”, proves just how powerful music and dance can be as story-telling tools.
On Showmax
(read more)
 #9 What’s new on DStv Now in July 2019
Here’s everything to look forward to on DStv Now in the month of July. In this list, we have only included titles that will be available to DStv Premium subscribers using the DStv Now app or website.
 On DStv Now
(read more)
#8 Teddy Pendergrass: If You Don’t Know Me
Teddy Pendergrass was the first African-American artist to record five consecutive platinum albums. In his heyday, he produced hits still well-loved today, including “Don’t Leave Me This Way” and, of course, “If You Don’t Know Me By Now”.
 On Showmax
(read more)
 #7 What’s new on Netflix in South Africa in July 2019
Returning seasons of fan favourites, brand-new shows that hold promise, plus a number of new comedy specials mean that July is going to be a great month of TV for Netflix subscribers.
On Netflix
(read more)
 #6 Zodwa Wabantu: uncensored and unapologetic
Zodwa Wabantu might’ve started her public career as a dancer, but she’s got bigger and better things planned than just twerking around a stage. Cue reality doccie series Zodwa Wabantu: Uncensored.
 On DStv Now
(read more)
 #5 What’s new on Amazon Prime Video in South Africa in July 2019?
In this post, we highlight the new Prime Originals that will be hitting South African subscribers’ screens in the month of July 2019. It’s going to be a month for sports buffs and comic book fans, with All or Nothing: The Carolina Panthers and The Boys both making their debut.
 On Amazon Prime 
(read more)
 #4 Triple Teen Choice 2019 nominee Good Trouble now streaming
In Good Trouble, now streaming on Showmax, Maia Mitchell and Cierra Ramirez play foster sisters Callie and Mariana Adams Foster, who have just moved to Los Angeles to begin their careers.
 On Showmax
(read more)
 #3 What’s new on Showmax in July?
Showmax has a bumper crop of exclusives this month, with hit series like HBO’s Euphoria, the latest season of Younger, the second instalment of Marvel’s Cloak & Dagger, the Fosters spin-off Good Trouble and Season 2 of Die Byl coming only to Showmax.
On Showmax
(read more)
 #2 Ray Donovan and the genre of the likeable baddie
Ray Donovan is the new Tony Soprano. A more respectable gangster, but still a gangster. He wears his crisp white shirts and immaculate suits with the style that befits his Hollywood fixer character.
 On Showmax
(read more)
 #1 Active Measures
This 2018 documentary explores allegations of collusion between the campaign of US President Donald Trump and Russian agents. Russian security services use the term “active measures” for political warfare that aims to influence world events. The film suggests that Russian president Vladimir Putin is behind a 30-year campaign of political warfare, culminating in the interference in the election of Donald Trump to the presidency of the US.
 On Showmax
(read more)

Our randomized trailer pick of the week

Each week we take a number from 1 to 10 from our list of suggestions and put it through a randomizer to choose a trailer to show you. This week it landed on our number 1 spot, Acrive Measures.

As summarized above, it chronicles the most successful espionage operation in Russian history, the American presidential election of 2016. Filmmaker Jack Bryan exposes a 30-year history of covert political warfare devised by Vladmir Putin to disrupt, and ultimately control world events. In the process, the filmmakers follow a trail of money, real estate, mob connections, and on the record confessions to expose an insidious plot that leads directly back to The White House. With democracy hanging in the balance, ACTIVE MEASURES is essential viewing. Unraveling the true depth and scope of “the Russia story” as we have come to know it, this film a jarring reminder that some conspiracies hide in plain sight. :

griffinTennis has a new hero after Monday’s Wimbledon – Cori Gauff
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Drie jaar na hulle vorige album is Wolfgang Marrow nog warmer!

In Rolbees Reviews, Uncategorized deur RolbeesRek jou bek

Hulle word so gou groot. Sug. Die newbie bands wat ek review het toe ek nog self nuut by Watkykjy was. Ek het weer Bad Advice van Wolfgang Marrow geluister en ek het nog steeds dieselfde opinie oor dié album as toe ek dit review het in 2016:
“Sandy Little het ‘n moerse sterk en versatile stem terwyl Louwkie Cronje se stem Kobus de Kock Jnr-rou kan raak. Dit kan nie fokken maklik wees om daai twee uiterstes geslyp te laat klink op ‘n album nie. En die ding is een van hulle trademarks, soos dit vir my klink, om daai twee sterk stemme te combine op meeste songs. Not easy at all. So, ek dink al wat ek mis partykeer is consistency en afronding met die vocals op van die heavier kick ass blues songs. Maar as ek ‘n betting man was sou ek sê Shadow and a Threat en Blood Lust Blues gaan een van die pilare van hulle sound vorentoe word. Maar dan weer is daar ‘n song soos The Curse. Wat ‘n befokte funky tune!”

Ja, dis nou drie jaar later maar het hulle my “bad advice” gevolg op hulle splinternuwe album? Haha, ek sou dit gelike het om al die krediet te kon vat vir die rigting waarin hulle besluit het om te in te gaan. Wel, miskien het hulle tog ‘n bietjie geluister want anders as op hulle debuutalbum, hoor ek nie meer ‘n weird-as-fuck small town garage band van Bloem, wat in die mees uiteenlopendste rigtings probeer eksperimenteer en my aandag wyd en verward laat span het nie. Dit was seker cool toe, maar bands moet groei of hulle kwyn weg.

Nee, inteendeel, ek hoor ‘n klomp gevestigde musikante wat al genoeg dues betaal het in verskeie donker hole, kerkbazaars en festivals, regoor Msanzi. Ek hoor ‘n Wolfgang Marrow album. OK, Sandy is nog steeds te eksentriek vir die deursnit vervelige musiekluisteraar, maar dis een van haar en (derhalwe) die Wolfies se handelsmerke. Haar unieke energie werk nog altyd goed saam met die res van die band. Ek dink net die baskitaartokkelaar het verander sedert die laaste album, maar Benjamin van Wyk kielie hom net so lekker.

Almal wat iets weet van musiek af sal vir jou sȇ: sonder ‘n ritmebende wat weet wat hulle doen (Benjamin en Bernard “Tiekie” Britz in hierie geval), klink dinge net af en ontydig. Hierdie dudes klink nie soos daai snotneuslaaitie in jou buurt wat altyd wou kom speel maar jy kruip eerder weg in die bougainvilleabos nie. Louwkie se kitaarspel het tegnies baie meer gegroei. Meer warmte en persoonlikheid. Konsekwentheid? Afronding? Ja, op hierdie opname klink dit stukke beter. Mastering? Ook kwaliteit, ja.

Wolfgang Marrow het hulle “studio seebene” gekry en geleer van klanke wat jou aandag trek, innemende kinkels met onvoorsiene draaie, behoorlike hakies en mooi melodieë. Fokol pretensie maar baie beheer. Dis die eenvoudige ou dingetjies wat die moeilikste is om reg te kry as jy ‘n album wil opneem waarna mense actually wil gaan sit en luister. Ek dink van hier af kan hulle net nog meer kreatief raak. Lirieke? “But the sun sets on all graves, kings and lawyers and office-chained slaves. If I should leave this world a little sooner than I’d like, I want you to have my records and that old ten-speed bike.” I rest my case. Damn!

Vir die van julle wat nie weet wie hierdie band is nie en dalk nuuskierig is oor die genre: dis moeilik deesdae om spesifiek te wees. Americana-Africana-blues-folk-rock-banana? Small town kids with small town nostalgia now hustling and enjoying big city life? So iets. Gaan koop die CD en vind uit. Daar is nog meer befokte lirieke in die boekie ook. En cool artwork. Spoke, wolwe wat op die telefoon praat en een van Sandy se boobs met ‘n spinnekop op. Spider-nipple, spider-nipple, Sandy Little and her spider-nipple. Check it out!

Net so nagedagte: dis ironies, maar nou dat hulle hierdie tipe grootmensalbum gemaak het, gaan hulle volgende keer nog harder moet werk en dalk net weer van voor af moet eksperimenteer met iets heeltemaal anders. Soveel pret om ‘n kunstenaar te wees! Maar ek dink nou weer te ver in die toekoms in. Geniet vir eers net hierdie nuwe materiaal op die draadloos en live!

Haa-lȇ-loo-ja!

RolbeesDrie jaar na hulle vorige album is Wolfgang Marrow nog warmer!