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‘n Lekker local playlist wat julle faktap kan luister in Coronavirus se self-isolasie of kawarantyn!

In Rolbees Reviews deur Rolbees2 Eiertjies

So, hoe geniet julle hierdie wonderlike apocalyptic nagmerrie sover? Fun, nê? Ons wil mos almal die aarde opfok met fossiel brandstowwe, fabrieksbesoedeling en die vernietiging van natuurlike woude en ander plantegroei om konstant plek te maak vir landbou grond en weivelde. Hou aan om julle plastiek in die oseane te versprei, asseblief. Dis net so erg soos die plastiek en alternatiewe waarhede op social media. This is what we get. Lag maar lekker vir Greta en vlieg die hele wêreld plat om die Joneses, Van der Merwes en Mahlangus te impress. Rits orals rond met ons fancy karre, busse, taxis en skorokoros. Sjina het nie ‘n alleenreg op die onstaan van Corona virusse nie, by the way. Covid-19 kon iewers in Wes-Afrika of Suid-Amerika ook onstaan het. Selfs hier aan die Suidelike punt van ons kontinent. En die virusse gaan net aanhou aanval soos wat die temperatuur hoër word. Onthou julle daai line in die Terminator? “It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear! And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are dead!”

But I digress, hier is ‘n playlist wat julle sat kan luister in self-isolasie of kawarantyn. Ek moes myself nou knyp nadat ek dit getik het:

Dit bevat onbekende Suid-Afrikaanse kunstenaars soos Take Them to the Woods, wat ek nogal geniet het in Januarie toe dit release is. Ek het obviously die stalwarts ook bygevoeg soos Anton Goosen en Karen Zoid se colab met oorlede Johnny Clegg en nog ‘n paar ander. Georgetown se nuwe tune saam met The Moonies is net so epic. Al daai lekker African vibes. Ons bly mos in Afrika. Ek is baie bly ek woon nie in Trumpland nie. Ek sal my kanse hier vat, dankie. Wie bly nou in ‘n shithole, huh? Dan is daar ‘n paar ouer classics op die playlist ook, en metaaaal! Metal is altyd die beste vir ‘n global Black Swan event.
Stuur nog idees vir tunes dan add ek dit. Onthou net, dit help zero as julle dit nie share of daarna luister nie. Dit kan dalk ‘n brood of twee koop vir die kunstenaars. Ek het dit eintlik meer opgestel as ‘n herinnering om iets meer daadwerkliks te doen. Promote jou gunsteling bands online, share watookal hulle nou aanvang, skenk of koop wat jy kan. Maar dink ook bietjie verder. Wie is almal deel van die value chain wat festivals en gigs aanbetref? Venues, klank, beligting, kostalletjies? Almal is nou in die selfde bootjie. Up Shit’s creek with a turd for a paddle. Veral as hulle nie partners in ander bedrywe, ekstra inkomstes of noodfondse het nie. Nou is die tyd om julle kreatiwiteit oortyd te laat werk.

Ek het die afgelope paar maande about niemand gevolg op social media nie. Dit het vir my soos ‘n tronk begin voel verlede jaar, maar ek sal bietjie meer aktief wees gedurende hierdie tyd. Selfs al is dit net om kwaliteit informasie te share. Covid19 het alles verander. Die wȇreld gaan nooit weer dieselfde wees nie. Ek stel voor julle kontak die artists wie julle love en hoor hoe julle kan help. Of raak betrokke by bestaande initiatiewe dalk.

O ja en Daaf Vapor het die wyse Demi Demi gesample. Ek het dit vir my nephew gestuur wat alleen in ‘n apartment in New York bly. Hy doen ‘n mentorskap by die United Nations op die oomblik en hulle werk almal van die huis af maar hierdie tune is nou sy quarantine anthem. Dis my self-isolation een ook. Tough times never last, only tough people last!

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Rolbees‘n Lekker local playlist wat julle faktap kan luister in Coronavirus se self-isolasie of kawarantyn!
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Nostalgie! Dunlop SP33 tyres en Pinocchio episodes 30 tot 35

In Movies en TV, Zefshop deur griffinRek jou bek

Om jou Dinsdae effens meer draaglik te maak in 2020, het ons besluit om bietjie nostalgies te raak. Ons gaan probeer om elke week ou TV shows, veral shows uit baie van julle se kinderdae, asook ou TV advertensies, uit te grawe en hier op Watkykjy te plak. Maybe is jy heeltemal te fokken jonk om enige van hierdie kak te onthou, maar dit maak nie saak nie – welkom by ons kinderjare en welkom by old school TV, geborg deur Zefshop.

Dunlop SP33 tyres
Hierdie advertensie uit die 80s is nou fokken netjies gedoen en dit is moerse verbeeldingryk. Die agency (wie die ookal was) het gebruik gemaak van honde rondom ‘n racetrack. Normaalweg sou jy honderesies assosieer met windhonde (Greyhounds), maar hulle het besluit om ‘n stewige Staffie in te gooi as die underdog. En terwyl hulle van die tyres praat, praat hulle eintlik van die brakkie:
“Dunlop SP33: very tenacious, very sure-footed. Gripping in the wet and in the dry”.

Dis ‘n moerse basic boodskap wat in 45 sekondes oorgedra word maar die filming moes sekerlik ‘n fokken nagmerrie gewees het. Fun, maar ter selfde tyd hondkak. Al daai honde moes om die track hardloop, die staffie moes die hero wees, die ander honder moes “uitfok”, so daar moes spesialiste on-site gewees het. Who ever die filming gedoen het – die ouens het hulle shots gekry – vasn die Staffie wat oor sy skouer kyk om te sien hoe vêr voor hy is, tot die laaste victory sprong deur die wenstreep se lint.  En dit alles op Chariots of Fire wat destyds heavy topical was. Well, done, wie julle ookal kon gewees het!

Hierdie week se main attraction is egter Pinocchio
Fun fact:
Die 1940s Disney version van Pinocchio was die eerste film ooit wat famous mense gebruik het vir voice overs!

Pinocchio Episode 31 – Reunie met Rocco
Die gang word gevang toe hulle melk steel by ‘n boer. Pinocchio moet melk gaan haal vir die kat wat kamtig baie siek is. Lekker fokken aansitterig. Rocco daag op en Pinocchio werk sy poes af om hom te bevry. Pinocchio besluit om die kat en die jakkals terug te kry vir al hulle kak en dat hulle vir hom moet graft.

Pinocchio Episode 32 – Snaakse slak
Hulle is op pad ne die feë maar Gina voel so bietjie kakkerig. Hulle ontmoet ‘n bok wat die pad ken, as one does. Pinocchio word ongeduldig en konterig en maak kak terwyl die feë probeer snooze. Gina tune hom om sy kak te stoep, maar hy het fokol ore.

Pinocchio Episode 33 – Die ballonrit
Pinocchio is dikbek omdat hy nie die feë kon sien nie maar sien skielik ‘n groot ballon wat nader beweeg. Pinocchio moet die ballon oppas en die loods sal hom vergoed deur hom in die ballon te laat ry. Hy probeer die ballon beskerm teen die jakkals en die kat en vlieg weg maar die twee konte gryp ‘n tou en vlieg saam soos die dose wat hulle is.

Pinocchio Episode 34 – Pinocchio dien as ‘n voëlverskrikker
Hulle land met die ballon en ‘n jagter arresteer hulle en neem hulle na die vallei. Ek het nie geweet dat jagters mens kan arresteer nie, maar whatevs. Die jakkals en kat word aan ‘n boom vasgebind in die aartappelland en die boer wil hulle opfok. Pinocchio kry die assholes jammer en gryp in.

Pinocchio Episode 35 – Die gesteende goue horlosie
Hierdie keer ontvang Pinocchio ‘n goue horlosie van die jakkals en die kat omdat hy hulle gehelp het. Almal weet daai kak is nie legit nie. Dis gesteel. Almal behalwe Pinocchio. ‘n Nuwe vriend, Greco, leer hom om die tyd te lees maar in die nag kom steel die twee skelms weer die horlosie terug aangesien hulle dit by die shops gesteel het in die eerste plek en Pinocchio het nie geweet nie. Fokken told you, mos.

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griffinNostalgie! Dunlop SP33 tyres en Pinocchio episodes 30 tot 35
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Covid Nineteen en die local scene

In Rolbees Reviews deur RolbeesRek jou bek

Lanklaas gesien, Watkykertjies. Ja, ongelukkig leef ek nog. Ek het die afgelope paar maande my tyd aan persoonlike verantwoordlikhede, ‘n sabbatsverlof en ‘n deurlopende skryfprojek bestee. Onkruid vergaan nie maklik nie. Dit spring net weer op wanneer jy dit die minste verwag. So, aangesien ons ons nou bevind in die middel van ‘n rampspoedige strontskou het Watkykjy geen keuse as om weer goeie musiek aan belangstellendes (nou in self-isolasie of dalk selfs kwarantyn) voor te hou nie. Die geldmarkte en wȇreldekonomie is besig om te tank en die planeet bewillig virusse om ons homo sapiens te illumineer. Die strate, restaurante, winkelsentrums en musieklokale gaan al hoe leër word en die hospitale en apteke al hoe voller. Die globale voorsieningsketting is lanklaas so getoets, so verwag maar die ergste en hoop vir die beste. Dis ‘n biologiese, sosio-ekonomiese oorlog wat ons wel gaan wen, op die ou einde. Die vraag is net hoeveel soldate gaan daar in die slag bly? Ten minste was almal nou hulle hande twintig keer ‘n dag en mense met ersntige OCD voel nie meer so ongemaklik nie. Ek koop al jare lank meer toiletpapier as wat ek moet. Welcome to the club, society. Ek weet net nie hoekom sommige mense ses maande s’n koop nie. Dis nie nodig om ‘n asshole te wees nie.

Ek dink ek gaan net weer musiek wat decent is share – playlists, albums en videos. Fans wat in hierdie tye nog finansieël kop bo water kan hou, moet dalk verantwoordelikheid neem en bedag raak op hoe kunstenaars hulle geld gemaak het voor Covid-19 en nou ‘n ander tipe bydra begin maak sodat die kreatiewe deel van ons samelewing, wat ons genot en verligting gebring het toe die diepste donker tye ons oorval het, nie ondergaan nie. Gigs gaan begin kwyn en groot festivals is nou so 2019, nê? So skenk wat jy kan aan geldsinsameljngsprojekte of crowdfunding. Koop CDs, T-shirts en ander merch. Ondersteun gigs onder 100 mense of selfs kleiner house gigs as jy nie direkte persoonlike kontak met hoë risiko individuele gaan hȇ nie. Ek is nie hier om te preek nie, julle is almal slim genoeg om die wetenskap te verstaan. Of maybe nie. Ek hou die hele storie al van Desember fyn dop en ons government doen sover uitstekende werk. Bly positief en moenie fake news en conspiracy theories volg of versprei nie. Unfollow idiots. Die virus is nie deur Trumpland of China vervaardig nie en garlic, bleach, essential oils en kruie is nie ‘n wonderkuur nie. Good luck with that.

Soos voorheen het ons ons beperkinge wat tyd, geld en mannekrag aanbetref en ons gaan waarskynlik nie in-diepte reviews of interviews publiseer nie. Die goeie ding is, die interwebs is immuun teen die aansteeklike agent Covid 19. Dit kan nie hier repliseer nie. Wat wel kan repliseer in die kubberruim is idees. As ons nie almal spasie kan deel in die regte lewe nie dan kan ons ten minste idees aanhou deel.

 

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RolbeesCovid Nineteen en die local scene
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Ten times diseases nearly ended the world. Also, don’t panic about the Coronavirus.

In Movies en TV deur griffinRek jou bek

Our top 10 weekly selection of DSTV Now | Showmax | YouTube | Netflix | Amazon Prime

First of all, please understand that there is a difference between panicking and acting responsibly. To panic means to have a sudden uncontrollable fear or anxiety, often causing wildly unthinking behaviour. You get it? Good.

So far, loadshedding has most definitely killed more people in South Africa that the Coronavirus. Because as of now, the Coronavirus has killed zero people and I can assure you there have been fatal motor accidents, shootings, robberies and crime related fatalities that can be connected to loadshedding. Not to mention failure of medical equipment reliant on electricity.

Through the ages there have been some tough times when it comes to communicable diseases. Here are ten of those times:

The Antonine Plague
This bad boy wiped out one-third of the Roman army. Back in AD165, Roman soldiers were unaware of the fact that they were carrying either smallpox or measles when they returned from their near-east missions. For those who are like “What the fuck is the Near East?” – it was roughly the area of the Ottoman Empire which encompasses Western Asia, Turkey, and Egypt. Over a period following more or less 15 years, outbreaks killed roughly 2000 people a day. This resulted in Rome’s inability to hold back tribes in the north. They should have coughed on them. Maybe they did, because a whopping total of 6.5 million people died.

The Plague of Justinian 
We can blame infected rats as it slipped into Constantinople from China in 541 AD killing. At its peak, it was killing up to 10k people per day! The plague fucked up Emperor Justinian’s tax-base, undermining his ability to fuck up the Vandals and the Goths. This in effect shattered any hopes and chances of uniting the Western and Eastern Roman Empires. Justinian himself was one of the lucky few who was infected and survived. When he eventually died he was 83 and it was probably of natural causes. That’s very impressive. It today’s terms, he would been like 203 years old. Justinian was one of the deadliest pandemics in history, resulting in the deaths of an estimated 25–50 million people during two centuries of recurrence, a death toll equivalent to 13–26% of the world’s population at the time of the first outbreak. Fokken yikes!

The Black Death was the biggest one
The bacterium Yersinia pestis (fuck, it sounds like a Greek pop star)  killed up to 60% of Europe’s population between 1348 and 1350, reducing the global number of people to 350 million! Ever wonder where the phrase “live for the moment” came from? It took roughly 150 years for the population to recover. Goeie fok!

London’s Great Plague killed 100,000 people between 1665-1666.
This was a viral hemorrhagic fever and the infections began on the docks in 1665 because it was imported on ships from Amsterdam transporting bales of cotton. It was spread by Stevedores who crowded in squalor on the docks. What made it worse was instructions to eradicate all the cats and dogs in the city because the the rat population skyrocketed. Rats carried the fleas that carried the disease. What saved them? The Great Fire which started at either the bakery or baker’s house of Thomas Farriner on Pudding Lane. It burnt down the disease ridden houses and buildings.  Yay fire!

The Great Plague of Marseilles in 1720 – 100,000 people dead! 
In 1720 a merchant ship named Grand-Saint-Antoin stopped in Cyprus which was ridden with plague before it embarked for Marseilles. Upon arrival it was put under quarantine. It was known that passengers on the ship perished, even the ship’s doctor! But money talks and powerful city merchants had influence and had the ships quarantine lifted. They wanted to get to all the shit they paid for which was on board. By the time the disease was under control, half of the fucking area’s people had died! Yay money!

Moscow’s plague and subsequent riot from 1771. Up to 200,000 people dead!
By late 1770, the bubonic plague had Moscow by the balls and by spring of the following year it was a full blown epidemic. So they tried to quarantine people which just angered them. Riots and the destruction of public property followed. The economy was like “I’m out!” and pulled the handbrake and this lead to food running out. Monumental fuck up of note! Soldiers finally had to restore order whilst at the same time distributing food. Yay soldiers!

The Third Cholera Pandemic
This one is an ugly fucker. It is a disease of the large intestine and transmitted through contaminated water. The Third Cholera Pandemic lasted from 1852 to 1859 as it swept through Asia, North America, and Africa hitting Russia particularly hard causing a million Russian deaths. The third cholera pandemic was the words by far. Oh and FYI, apparently the the seventh cholera pandemic is still going on..

The Russian flu pandemic of 1889-1890
This was a deadly influenza pandemic that killed about 1 million people worldwide. It was also dubbed “Asiatic flu” although it began in Russia. It spread rapidly through Europe made a draai in North America and finally reached Asia before tapering off. Ironically back in good old South Africa at the same time, a fuck load of railway lines opened for the first time. Yay modern travel!

The 1918 Spanish flu
You know how swine flu hit the world decade or so ago? Yeah… that’s now a new thing. The Spanish flu pandemic from 1918 was H1N1 and killed 75 million people and the majority of victims where young and healthy. Estimates actually had the number of dead of around 6% of the global population back then because cases were reported from the Pacific Islands to the Arctic. That’s basically everywhere. The disease did not originate in Spain – European nations just had the most accurate and uncensored reporting of the outbreak resulting in the belief that it started there. It returned again in 2009 and between 10% and 20% of those infected died from the H1N1 flu virus.

The Hong Kong Flu of 1968
Hey, this is our time! Let’s get yo the scary stuff. 1968 isn’t that long time ago and The Hong Kong flu epidemic shows how a modern crisis might hit the world. Bryan Adams could make a song a bout it. It was the Summer of ’68 when the first outbreak was reported in Hong Kong. By September, the flu reached India, Philippines, Australia and Europe. Troops returning from Vietnam brought it to California, just in time for Christmas. By January of ’69 it rolled into South America, Japan and Africa.  A million people died, but the virus only had a case-fatality ratio of only .5%. Does that sound scary and familiar? It does. And I repeat – don’t panic.

Coronavirus disease (COVID-19) symptoms
Runny nose
Sore throat
Cough
Fever
Difficulty with breathing in severe cases.

Exhibiting these symptoms could still just mean that you just have normal run-of-the-mill flu. If you feel super kak, visit a doctor. If you feel fine, please read and share news about it responsibly. Follow these guys on twitter, as they share the legit news, officially and responsibly.

Here is a less scary top 10 of movies and TV series picks from the Plumlist. It means you can stay indoors and watch TV and not get infected:
10# The Test: A New Era for Australia’s Team
The eight-part docuseries will premiere on Prime Video around the world in more than 200 countries and territories, giving viewers a behind-the-scenes look at how one of the world’s best cricket teams fell from grace and was forced to reclaim their title and integrity.
On Amazon Prime
(read more)
 #9 The sexiest movies and series to stream
They say that chivalry is dead (and good riddance, frankly – we’re all capable of opening our own car doors, thank you very much) and old-fashioned romance might be going the same way. But it’s not all bad news – for all the cynics, singletons and red-blooded humans out there, Showmax brings the steamiest 18+ rated content you’ll find on any streaming platform.
On Showmax
(read more)
#8 Nine biographies and real-life dramas to stream
Crime, war, money, drugs, politics, the 70s, terrorist attacks, conspiracy theories and good old American patriotism: they’re all here. Sure, there are books to read about historical events, but Hollywood has made it so much easier to get some facts into your skull while eating popcorn. Here’s our pick of 9 real-life dramas to stream on Showmax.
 On Showmax
(read more)
 #7 Seventeen series for self-isolation
From drama series about the real-life spread of diseases, to workplace comedies that serve as nostalgic reminders of when we could actually all go to the same space together to do our jobs, to boxsets of series with enough episodes to keep you occupied for hours on end, to NSFW shows that are strictly for adults, to just downright excellent entertainment, here are our picks for these dark times.
On Amazon Prime, Showmax, Netflix, DStv Now
(read more)
 #6 What to expect in Westworld Season 3
Ahead of the release of Season 3 of Westworld early next week, HBO has asked nicely that those of us who have watched the first four episodes please not give away any spoilers. That’s no problem, because they are as topsy-turvy as the preceding 10 episodes of Season 2.
On Showmax
(read more)
 #5 Meet the cast of Still Breathing
The first thing people do in the face of a challenge is to stop breathing. And that feeling of sheer terror and panic doesn’t go away immediately. It lingers, like in M-Net’s brand-new drama Still Breathing, which is streaming on DStv Now – new episodes land every Thursday night.
On DStv Now 
(read more)
 4# Get the scoop on Press, the one-season TV wonder about the British news industry
The six-part series Press, now streaming only on Showmax, presents two British newspapers at opposite ends of the news spectrum, and pits them and their journalists against each other.
 On Showmax
(read more)
 #3 Murdoch Mysteries
Season 13 is a special instalment of the popular crime drama series because the show celebrates its 200th episode (episode 14) and there’s much fanfare with a number of returning faces like Lisa Norton, John Trench, Dmitry Chepoverstky and others reprising roles from previous seasons.
On DStv Now 
(read more)
 #2 Our pick of the funniest moments from S6 of Brooklyn Nine-Nine
Since its 2013 debut, Brooklyn Nine-Nine has racked up two Emmys, two Golden Globes, two Critics’ Choice Awards and a GLAAD Award for its depictions of LGBT characters and relationships. The Office and Parks and Recreation creator Michael Schur’s quirky series has been hailed as the most delightful crime comedy on TV, and a beacon of wholesome joy.
 On Showmax
(read more)
 #1 The excellent cast and spooky premise of Emergence will keep you guessing
Golden Globe nominee Allison Tolman (Fargo) stars as police chief Jo Evans, with BET Comedy Awards winner and Teen Choice nominee Donald Faison (Scrubs) as her ex-husband Alex in this sleeper hit of a sci-fi drama series.
On DStv Now
(read more)

Our randomized trailer pick of the week

Each week we take a number from 1 to 10 from our list of suggestions and put it through a randomizer to choose a trailer to show you. This week it landed on our number 7 spot, Seventeen series for self-isolation“, so we spin the wheel again and it lands on number 10 which is National Geographic’s The Hot Zone:

In 1989, Ebola landed on U.S. soil. After appearing in a research lab in D.C., a heroic U.S. Army scientist put her life on the line to prevent an outbreak. Inspired by true events and starring Julianna Margulies:

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griffinTen times diseases nearly ended the world. Also, don’t panic about the Coronavirus.